Read this in: German
How to deal with criticism
Today I’m writing about positivity and criticism. You are positive but there are always people who criticize what you do or who you are? How do you get away from this negativity? Is there a secret?
Did this happen to you as well?
You write about something you care. Or you write about your opinion on a topic. Something that is individual and subjective. And then you get a comment that criticizes your opinion or your point of view. I totally don’t get it. Of course we are all different but if I say I like this, why are you telling me I’m wrong? No – I’m not wrong because this is my personal opinion. You are wrong because you try to change my opinion.
“Two things prevent us from happiness: living in the past and judging others.” Paulo Coelho
Germany is the leader
Unfortunately this is very sad that I have to say this but Germany is the leader in criticize people. I really have the comparison. I write in two languages and I have followers from all over the world. My German articles are read by the Germans. My english articles are read from all other countries. I post most of my articles also on FB Groups and response is so different from each other. On German groups you have almost always someone who 1. question something you say 2. criticizes or 3. wants to impose their opinion.
I really find that strange because if I read something about someone and maybe I don’t think the same way I would never ever criticize. Why would I do that? Because we don’t have the same opinion? So what. That is normal. We are not always the same and that is our world. If I love the sun and you don’t. Does it mean the sun is bad because you love the rain? No. It only means you prefer staying in places where there is not so much sun and I want to stay in places where the sun shines almost everyday. That is perfect because it would be difficult if we all would love the sun. Would be a pretty crowded place. 😉
„In Germany envy is the sincerest form of recognition“ Arthur Schopenhauer
It is not what you write or do what’s wrong. It’s the others people envy that brings to criticism. You maybe have a life what other people would love to have as well but they are lacking of courage. Because they can’t have (what they maybe would like to have) they try to make you smaller. Maybe because your job or blog is better than theirs. Maybe because you travel more often than they. Because you are happy and they are not. But this in NOT your fault neither your problem. Get over it and don’t think too much about it.
„Our ultimate freedom is the right and power to decide how anybody or anything outside ourselves will affect us.“ Stephen Covey
Tolerance is something that many people don’t understand. The meaning of being tolerant. To tolerate doesn’t mean you have to like everything. But real tolerance means to accept different opinions without trying to impose yours. Doesn’t sound really difficult right. But for many people it is apparently.
I don’t know why I should waste my energy for something I can’t change. This is why I maybe don’t try to discuss some things with a person, if I can see that this kind of person is not willing to accept my opinion. I just don’t waste my time for that. Does it mean I’m weak? Does it mean I don’t have enough self-confidence? Hm, no. It does only mean that I use my time more productive than maybe other people.
„I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.“ ~Mahatma Gandhi
Live and let live
For me this is my mantra. I’m living like that for many many years now. And I totally believe in that from the deepest of my heart. Because why would I judge others people’s life? Why would I judge about different opinions? What makes be better to do that? Do I stand over some people who I can decide whats right or wrong? NO. Absolutely not. I love my life and I’m living my life how I want to live it. It doesn’t have to be the life for everyone. But this is ok because I LIVE MY LIFE. And you should do the same.
„If we try to see something positive in everything we do, life won’t necessarily become easier but it becomes more valuable“. Author Unknown
How do you deal with criticism?
If the critics are constructive than I’m more than happy to hear that. Because I’m always willing to learn. But if the critics are just a hidden message for being rude or mean than I don’t even bother to answer. Because there is no answer for that. If someone criticizes you and your work just because they are mean or invidious than you will never have the chance to change their opinion. Why spending your time for that? Why thinking about that? Don’t! Beware your inner peace and just forget about that. I only say one world – KARMA!
Positivity will change your life
„Life is a boomerang. What you give you get“
Being positive is one of the most important characteristic you have. It will lighten up your life – every minute, every day, every moment. You can smile at so many things. Having a positivity in your heart will definitely let you stand out for. The glow from your heart will fill your eyes and your soul. This may sound a little crazy but I can tell you only the things I believe in.
I live like that for many many years now and I’m totally happy with that. People will recognize that and say to you: „Your simile is so beautiful“. I’m not talking about (outward) appearances. I’m talking about your beauty that comes from inside. If you have a positive attitude you will have a positive life. You can’t change other people but you can change how you deal with it.
„A strong positive mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug.“ Patricia Neal
You don’t need negativity in your life
A few years ago I really made a though decision. I ended a long long friendship. I then (afterwards) realized that it wasn’t a friendship at all because I was the only one believing in that friendship. But I ended it because this person gave me always so much negativity that I felt bad. In every occasion and all the time. Like the whole world is bad to her and all the people are stupid and whatever I did was wrong. After so many years I sat down and I said to me: „I don’t want that negativity in my life anymore.“ I’m the person who I am and if someone doesn’t like me this way than this is ok. But I will not change for anyone.
I think everyone has to take some tough choices in life. If it’s a friendship, a job or maybe your partner. You have to do whats best for you! This is your life and only yours!
„There are two types of people who will tell you that you cannot make a difference in this world: those who are afraid to try and those who are afraid you will succeed.“ Ray Goforth
You can’t please everybody
If you keep that in mind you will have less problems. Because you definitely can’t please everyone. And it shouldn’t be your goal anyway!! Be whatever you like to be. Be the person you really want to be and you will have a positive life. All the decisions you take are yours. The mistakes you make are yours. And you will learn from that and grow.
“Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you’ll be criticized anyway. You’re damned if you and damned if you don’t.” Eleanor Roosevelt
Life your life how you want to life it
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Some great advice – sometimes understanding the criticism can help you grow – assuming it was in good faith and not just someone being mean.
I totally agree with you